Creativity Unleashed

You wouldn't know this by looking at me but I am constantly composing photographs and videos in my head from the day to day things happening around me. I have been driving down the road and the images I am seeing around me are so inspiring that they start to become a scene in a movie not yet written but playing in my mind. Or the light has been shining just perfectly off a man hunched over his book in a coffee shop and I snap the picture in my mind (or sneakily with my cell phone if it's handy), thinking of all the different angles and perspectives I could take that picture with. Or I see an advertisement and start to redesign the content, changing fonts and spacing and images. I can't help it. It's just how my mind works.  

I am a creative. 

It is a part of me that I ignored for a long time, so long in fact that it started pushing it's way out and into my day to day life. I ignored it for a long time because of fear - fear of not being good enough, fear of not having original ideas, basically fear of failure. For a long time that fear held me back and kept my creativity corralled.  


It took a long time to do it but I have finally stood up and looked that fear directly in the eye, declaring that no longer would it have a paralyzing hold over me. 

It's amazing what happens when you do that - look fear in the eye and challenge it's hold. It looses some of it's power over your life. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't like a one and done type of thing where I rose up and then it left. It is still a daily choice to not give in to it and put too much of my attention there. It's a daily choice to claim my inheritance as a child of the Creator of the universe and keep my eyes fixed above on the One who holds me close and walks this journey with me. 

But in it all I have found a freedom that has breathed new life and breath into my soul. In a lot of ways I feel more like me. The true me that God dreamed up as He knit me together. 

Might I still fail? Yes. But I know my failure will not take me out. If, or better yet when failure happens I will use it to grow and become better. I will pick myself up off the ground and keep moving forward because I know my loving Father is walking this journey with me and leading me one step at a time into His plans and purposes for my life. And there is freedom there. 

Haiti...it happened

3 weeks ago today I was at the Kaliko Beach Club, anticipating the long trek home and reflecting on the previous 10 days. We had been away from the Mephiboscheth House (M-House) for less than a day and I already missed all the kids. They have a way of working themselves into your heart!

Here's are some of the kids who impacted me the most:

Shelton: this little boy captured the biggest piece of my heart! I'm not sure if it was his gangly limbs, his mischievous, curious spirit or his quick smile but he is one of the ones I miss the most. He has CP-like symptoms that limit the use of his legs. He has worked up to being able to take a few steps before falling to the ground. He also can't speak but does a great job communicating with hand gestures and sounds.

This series of pictures captures pretty perfectly his mischievous side:

Kiki: This is the other guy who captured a big piece of my heart! Kiki lost his parents to the earthquake that rocked this small country in 2010. He also has CP-like symptoms which severely limit his mobility. He has one good hand and is great at hitting a ball around! He is very fun loving and is quick to smile. He does have a bit of a stubborn side...however, I think some of it is for show. :)

Here's a short video of Shelton and Kiki (the kids loved getting videotaped once they knew my camera could do that):

Nadege: this girl is the queen of dominoes and will beat you every time! I don't know how she does it. She is one of the sweetest girls around and her smile would light up the darkest room. She uses a walker to get around and has very little speech. By the end of the trip however, she would look at me, smile and softly say "Kari". It melted my heart. She has a really sweet spirit and radiates Christ.

Shelove: this sweet gal worked her way into my heart. Everytime she saw me she would come over and sit or stand by me and just smile in my direction. She saw something in me she liked and was often nearby. She can't speak, has a difficult time walking and seems to process things really slowly. It was fun to say things to her and then watch as she processed it. She has a heart wrenching story that includes being unwanted and abused. When she got to the M House she was really withdrawn and didn't like to be touched, and now she loves to just be near you, holding your hand. She is a really sweet girl.

Jovanie: this sweet girl drew me in. Her body is very stiff and she moves with very jerky, awkward movements. She can only get around with the help of a walker and doesn't speak very well, although sometimes she tries. She is another one with a smile that lights up a room. She seems to be a girl who knows what she wants and who marches to her own beat. She seems to have a crush on one of the little boys there as one time I caught her throwing him a big smile and flirty wave from across the room. We brought nail polish with us and one afternoon she spent about 15 minutes painstakingly painting 2 of my finger nails. It was a moment of true beauty for me and I nearly started crying while I was sitting there with her. Another of my favorite Jovanie moments was another afternoon when I was taking pictures of everyone watching the World Cup. She saw me doing this, walked into the shot, posed and smiled in my direction. You can see the picture below.

I could go on and on about all the kids at the M House but will save those for another time! For now, I will leave you with a video of the kids who have captured a piece of me and shown me Jesus in ways that I have never experienced.

Haiti

I'm going to Haiti next month on a mission trip with teens from my church. We had a meeting yesterday and learned the history of that beautiful place. It is a sad history filled with exploitation and slavery. At one time it was the most profitable country in the world but because of exploitation it now sits near the bottom. What used to be a country rich in top soil and mahogany trees is now a country ravaged and partially destroyed.

We watched a video from the earthquake and my eyes leaked tears as I watched people in pain and suffering. I have no idea what it must have been like to experience a tragedy like that. I don't know how it feels to have the earth shake under you and everything you know ripped from you as building crumble on every side. My heart hurt for a people who have been pushed down and oppressed. People made in the image of an incredible Creator. People carrying pieces of Him within themselves. People loved dearly by that Creator. There were no words.

I don't know what the Lord has planned for us or for me in that place. But I know that I will feel things deeply. That I will bump up against really hard realities that I don't often see. That my heart will break in ways I didn't even know that it could. Through it all I just pray that the Lord would reveal His heart, His grace, His mercy, His love.

Silence

Silence.

It's a funny thing. It can be deafening and so loud you can barely hear yourself think in one moment and in the next it can feel so calm and peaceful. It can feel like a warm embrace or it can feel like a cold grip that won't let go.

I have a love hate relationship with silence. Sometimes I crave it and wish I had a few moments to just be and think when life starts to swirl around me. In those moments I run to it like a long lost lover that I can't wait to be reunited with. But then I get there. And I breathe. And the silence closes in. And all the thoughts and feelings I was able to keep at bay when I was running around come crashing down around me. Suddenly, I want to run back to the busy. Back to the distraction. Because at least when I was distracted I didn't have to feel. Didn't have to feel things like sadness and pain and longing unfulfilled.

But what I really need to do in those moments is to sink in and stay. To sink in with that sadness, the pain, the longing. To embrace it like an old friend. To feel it wash over me. To acknowledge that it's there. That it is real. That it is a part of my story. That it hurts.

I have found that when I do that, the cold grip of silence becomes more like a warm embrace. I have found that when I acknowledge the hurting places inside they begin to be mended, ever so slowly. It's still not always pleasant or something I desire, but as I sit in the silence I am healed and grown and made free.



What is your relationship with silence?

Unleashing Creativity

One way I want to unleash my inner artist and work on creativity is through the book The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. I was given this book as a gift about 4 years ago and have been meaning to do it ever since. And now I am. It is a 12 week program that "takes readers on an amazing twelve-week journey to discover the inextricable link between their spiritual and creative selves...it has inspired millions to overcome the limit beliefs and fears that can inhibit the creative process." I am entering into this 12-week journey with equal parts excitement and nervousness!

I started week 1 today and the first thing we had to do was to write down affirmations about our creativity and then record the negative thoughts, or Blurts, that came along with them. It was a really interesting process and good to record all of the negative thoughts that come into my mind as I try to embrace who God has made me to be. My Censor (the nasty internal critic who keeps up a running dialogue of subversive remarks that are masked as truth) has a field day when I start to pursue my creativity.

Here's slightly what he looks like...

In my head his suit is a lot more wrinkly, he has a raspy voice and he looks a little bit more like a mobster. Not sure where that image came from but that is what I picture when I think about my Censor. He will be the one I think I will come up against the most in this journey. Hopefully at the end of it all I will have learned how to silence his voice...or better yet, converted it to encouragement rather than criticism.

Each week of this journey consists of reading, some tasks to help my creativity and a check-in with myself. My other tasks for this week are to take myself on an artists date (2+ hour date doing something that will peak my imagination, this is a weekly occurrence), do Morning Pages (3 pages of stream-of-concisousness writing, also an every week task) that are done each day, and 3 other tasks that I need to choose from a list of 8 given in the book.

Let the unleashing begin...

Back in the blogging game!

Wow! I have been out of the blogging game for quite some time now! But that is about to change!

Just this week I have left my current job to step out into the world of the unknown and the creative. I am going to pursue things that bring me life and joy - film, photography, graphic design and well, pretty much anything creative. I have set aside the next 3 months to dive into these things, to play, explore, create. While I am really excited about it I also know it will be a a lot of work. I'm excited though to see where God is going to take me as I step out and follow after his call for my life!

Part of my plan is to documenting my time with this creative journey to this blog. Maybe I'll even post some of my work here for you to see!

Now off to create...and play...and explore...

More soon!

Over the past year the image of the tree has become pretty significant to me. The Lord often speaks to me through pictures and images, and the image of a tree seems to continue to come up. I have often found myself drawn to paintings and designs that incorporate trees.

At the beginning of this present journey the tree was small, just a shoot. Tender and willowy with roots that barely breached the soil. It was easily bent and swayed by the wind that often swirled around it. While it was planted in the soil and rooted there, moments would go by that would tug at the very roots holding it in place. The tree often felt like an moment she would lose her hold and be carried off by the mighty rushing wind.

As time went on an amazing thing happened, the tree grew. The roots dug themselves down more deeply into the soil, the trunk thickened and became more firm, the branches began to reach towards the heavens. The winds still rushed and swirled around but the little tree was no longer swayed as easily. There were less and less moments where the tree felt like it would be plucked from the soil it clung to and carried off by the wind. There was a settling, a confidence that no longer would the slightest breeze threaten to overtake the tree.

As the tree stretched toward heaven joy began to spring forth. It started small at first, just little hints here and there, but as the sun shone down and the tree soaked in it's warmth, as the roots grabbed hold of the soil and felt their firm grasp, the tree couldn't help but be overcome. She knew that she was growing, changing, strengthening. She knew that she was firmly planted in a soil so rich she only had to soak in it's nutrients. Her job, her task was to soak in the sun, feel it's warmth, bask in its greatness and to open herself up to the richness in the soil holding her in place.

She still had much more growth to do, but now, being a bigger and stronger tree, she could dance with the wind instead of bow her head in shame and fear.

Grieving

I am grieving. There I said it. It's out in the open. Hidden no more.

But I'm not grieving in the traditional sense. I didn't lose a loved one to death. Instead I am experiencing the grief of changing friendships / relationships.

I never thought that one could grieve over something other than someone that you love dying and no longer being around. I never thought I would grieve the changing of relationship with friends who I care deeply for. In fact, it feels very humbling, and frankly embarrassing, to admit grieving over the changing of relationships.


I have always been strong. In crisis situations I have always been looked to for strength and support, to be the strong one, the one that nothing phases. Being the oldest child from a messy home, I am guessing I came by this naturally. I am also a pretty even person. I don't typically have really high highs or really low lows. People are always telling me how strong I am and how great I handle things. Because of that I have often pressured myself to remain strong in tough situations.

This has all changed this past year. As I have been working on my inner self, the Lord and I have taken a journey into the depths of my soul. What I have found there has been much pain and heartache, but also freedom and love that I have never known. I have experienced some pretty low lows and have seen sides to myself that make me want to hide my head in shame. I'm not the strong stoic person I, and many others, think that I am. I am a meek, timid, scared little girl looking for love and acceptance. I am a girl filled with many hurts, a girl desperately in need of a Savior, a friend.

I have been an absolute mess and more so, allowed myself to be that mess and allowed others to see it. Of course not everyone is privy to my mess and I am sure that the majority of people in my life have no idea the journey that this has been. But I have worked hard and fought to remain true and authentic with my closest circle of friends. And a fight it has been. I have battled the fear that friends would grow weary of walking with me in my messy, hurting, needing state and turn away. I am sad to admit there have been many days were I listened to that fear and hid my hurt, my pain, my mess so that I wouldn't seem so needy. But there were other days where I humbly asked for help, grace and love, knowing that if my burden became too much to bear and they couldn't take it and walked away, that Christ would still be by my side.

As I asked for help and opened myself up an incredible thing happened. I found love. I found grace. I found acceptance. I found women who stood by me, prayed with me, cried with me, loved me in spite of my mess. And I have clung to them and really come to realize how much they mean to me. Realize that I never would have made it through this journey without them. Realize how much I love them.


But time marched on.


Within the last 5 months one moved far way, one has gotten married (one who I had lived with and shared life with for over 8 years) and one is about to be married. All wonderful things. Things that deep within I rejoice over and thank the Lord for. Things I have prayed with them for and am so excited about. But what that means for me is a drastic change in all 3 of my closest relationships.

I didn't realize all these things compiled together in such a short amount of time would mean grief. I didn't realize how much those relationships meant to me until they shifted and changed. I didn't realize how much I relied on that love and support until it looked different.

I am still friends with these women and hope to always be, but I am grieving what was. I used to be the one they talked with about hard days, the one they called when they needed to cry, the one they called when something great happened and they couldn't wait to share it, and the one they wanted to hang out with on a Friday night.

Within my soul I know that I will get through this. I know that we will figure out this new kind of relationship, that time will march on, that our relationship will morph and shift like the changing of the seasons. But I also know that I need time to grieve.


Weird. Grieving relationships that still are. Grieving the loss of people who still live and move and are a part of my life, albeit in different ways. But I need to do it. I need to allow myself the space and freedom to mourn, to be sad, to miss what was.

It sucks. It's humbling. It's hard. But it's real. And that is what I have been fighting for this past 18 months - being honest with where I'm at and gentle with myself. Allowing myself to feel, to breathe, to be real. For too long I have stuffed feeling and emotion so that I could "be alright," and "be strong" only to become this broken, wrecked, lost individual.

So I humbly ask for grace as I walk through the tangled web of emotions that is grief. I know I won't do it perfectly. I know it will be hard on more than just me. But I also know I need to walk this path.

Thankful

"You have set our iniquities before you, our secret sins in the light of your presence." (Psalm 90: 8)
But it is there, in the light of your presence, fully seen for all that we are, that grace abounds. There in that vulnerable, scary place we find love, a limitless, merciful, amazing love. Love that washes our iniquity, our sin, away, leaving us spotless before your throne.

Serving. Friends. Refreshment.

Fargo, ND a town about 3 hours away from the Twin Cities is located along the Red River. The unique thing about the Red River is that it flows north instead of south. Because of this it is prone to flooding in the spring when the southern part of the river thaws more quickly than the northern part. Right now the town of Fargo is preparing itself for some massive flooding. The river is already over it's banks and continues to rise. The community has banded together to lay around 2 million sandbags in an effort to stop the water.

My friend Dave had the incredible idea to drive up there for the day to help. We left the Twin Cities at 9 am on Sunday morning and got up there around lunchtime. We parked at the Fargodome and loaded one of the buses bound for the dikes.

Driving to the work site was a tad surreal. The city has built dikes made out of dirt in different portions of the city. These dikes look like large dirt walls running down half of the street, leaving only one lane to drive on. The homes on the other side are blocked in by these dirt dikes on one side and sandbag dikes on the other. The theory behind it is if the water makes it through the sandbags then the wall of dirt will stop it from flooding the entire neighborhood. I had never seen anything like it. Pulling up to the work site our bus our bus slid around a corner. If you have never experienced a bus sliding in slow motion around a corner, it's pretty sweet (only because we didn't hit anything).

We worked for about 5 hours laying sandbags to help build a dike and guesstimate that we helped place around 1,500 sandbags. We also met some fun people in the process: there was a youth group there (which made it feel a little bit like we were on a YouthWorks site), we met 2 people who had worked at camp with one of our co-workers, a man who is the uncle of someone who used to work for YouthWorks, and a guy who is dating a girl who went to high school with Dave. In addition we met a lot of really cool people who live in Fargo.

Getting dirty (we were covered in mud), working side by side with friends and strangers, and accomplishing something tangible was a super refreshing way to spend the day.

The year of 2009 I have dedicated to learning to love others better. To put daily into practice the verse that says "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." (Philippians 2:3). The phrase "consider others better than yourself" has been running on a looped track in my head these last few months. There are moments where I live this out very well and almost want to boast at the way I am putting others ahead of me, but I am ashamed to say that there are many more times where I take the selfish path. The path that looks the way I want it to look and the path that is the most comfortable and convenient for me.

Out there in the mud and muck, lifting 20 lb bags of sand and working with people from all walks of life this phrase often found it's place in my head. I found myself wondering how I could serve these friends and strangers in my midst. I found myself wondering if my sacrifice made a difference, if it had any effect on those around me. But then I remembered that I don't love and serve others for their sake. I love and serve others because they are reflections of the God I love and adore. I love and serve others because Christ calls me to that. I love and serve others because in serving and loving them, I am serving and loving Him.

My head hit the pillow late that night thankful. Thankful for friends and deepening relationships. Thankful for laughter. Thankful for car sing-alongs. Thankful for serving. And thankful for a God who loves me, despite moments of selfishness and vain ambition. Who loves me really, inspite of my sinful self. Who loves me because of the beauty He sees within me.

"He reached down from on high and took hold of me;
He drew me out of deep waters.
He rescued me from my powerful enemy,
from my foes who were too strong for me.
He brought me out into a spacious place;
He rescued me because
HE DELIGHTED IN ME."
Psalm 18: 16,17,19

A Time of Sacrifice

This post is a collection of all the random thoughts that are floating around in my head as of late:

It's crazy to think that Lent is already upon us. The Christmas season with it's hustle and bustle is a semi-distant memory. January, which turned out to be just as, if not more, busy than December seems like it only ended yesterday and yet March is staring us dead in the eye.

Lent starts tomorrow. Tomorrow I begin a journey that will last 40 days and which will culminate with the celebration of Christ's resurrection. I have decided this year to incorporate fasting into my sacrificial giving up. Fasting to petition the Lord. Fasting to cry out for a word. Fasting to draw me nearer to the heart of God. Fasting to ask for a gift.

As I think about this time I reflect on the current state of my life. Hungry but not satisfied. Longing but unable to seek. A place that wants to be hopeful but a place that more often feels pushed down and held back. I am struggling. Struggling to put God first, struggling to love Him with my whole being, struggling to connect intimately with my Creator, struggling to trust in his goodness in the midst of waiting. There is a hunger inside of me that keeps calling out, keeps asking to be filled. I am scared that as I keep ignoring it that it will become less and less, but that doesn't seem to be the case. In fact, the opposite is true. It seems to be growing bigger and bigger, not allowing me to forget it's existence. It's always there, calling out to me, urging me to come, but when when I do, when I make time, I run up against a brick wall. I don't know what this brick wall is or why it continues to hold me back. It's frustrating. I miss Jesus. I miss sweet fellowship. I miss growth and change. I miss steps made toward my God.

I'm seeking answers to things that have long gone unfulfilled. There are moments where I ask "is this worth it? do i really want to live this christian life?" I am being pushed to a place of trust that is scary and hard. All these may be my walls. Things that hold me back. Ways I am held at bay.

Why can't I break free? Why can't I be totally content just being loved by Jesus? Why do I long for more and more? Why are you silent God? Why can't I get back to that place of sweet fellowship?

i miss you.

i need you.

please hear my cry through sacrifice.

draw me near.

The Long-Awaited Update!

After many months I am finally tackling the impossible, updating my blog! Since I haven't updated in about 5 months I will give a brief update about each month.

July

July started after I finished my triathlon. Here are a few pictures of the event:




























The rest of July was spent enjoying the summer-hanging out outside, going to my cousin's wedding, spending time on the lake. I also participated in my first ever mud volleyball tournament. It was a blast!!
















August

August was a bit of a whirlwind at first with the end of the YouthWorks summer. I got to help out at the Minneapolis Exit RAMP, which allowed me to spend more time with some of the staff I had gotten to know over the summer. It was also spent trying to figure out my next steps career-wise. After interviewing and agonizing and looking for new jobs for weeks I accepted a position in the Training Department at YouthWorks. It is a 30 hour position (with benefits, thanks Lord!) so I have been doing some other odd jobs to supplement my income.

The MN State Fair was also a highlight of the month and some friends and I biked there from our house. It was a great time, walking around and sampling all the traditional fare that comes with the great MN get together.















September

September started out with a Labor Day weekend trip to NE WI. We went to stay at the cabin of a friend and then spent a day on Madeline Island. It was a great way to end the summer and bring in the fall.





















After 3 years of thinking about going back to school and pursuing graphic design I signed up for a course at the Minneapolis Community and Technical College. I took a class called Intro to Graphic Software and absolutely loved it! It was fun to be back in the college setting and to be pursuing something that I love. It was a bit hard to get back into the homework mode but for the most part I loved it all.

September was also the month where I moved into a new decade-30. To celebrate my roommate Danita decided that it was going to be a month of 30 days of 30 and celebrated my birthday every single day. I felt so loved and cared for by all the people who participated and I was also astounded by how much my friend knew me. It made turning 30 a whole lot easier. Some of the highlights included a birthday scavenger hunt, delicious treats delivered to work by many different friends, a weekend trip to Duluth, fun excursions around Minneapolis and the best gift, a scrapbook of my time in the Twin Cities. Almost daily I was left speechless by the love that surrounds me here.





















October

October included many fall type things-trips to the apple orchard, a cabin in WI, celebrating the birthday of one of our roommates, and seeing my nephew in his Halloween parade. It was also the month that I started my new position at YouthWorks. It was great to finally be working in that department and with the other 2 ladies on my team. I love the new position and am excited to go to work everyday.





















November

When November hit my nephew turned 4 and I was struck by how much he is resembling a little boy now instead of a toddler. In another couple years he will be in school, which is really crazy to think about.
















We also hosted our first ever Crock-Pot Cook-Off at our house About 30 people came over with crock-pots in tow. There was a lot of great food and conversation. We are already looking forward to next year's cook-off.












November was also the month that we had to put my grandpa Smith in the nursing home. Since I was born when he was in his 50's, it has been hard to watch him grow older. About 2 years ago he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and we are finally starting to see some of the effects from that. We went to visit him in he nursing home at Thanksgiving and it was really hard to see him break down and cry multiple times. I havemany fond memories of him over the years and I am sad to think that the end may be near for him.

December

December came in with a burst of Christmas music and signs of the season all around (well, actually November came in with Christmas displays being put up in all the stores). I love this time of year so it was fun to have holiday music, lights, and decorations making their appearance on lawns all over. December has also brought with it mountains of snow and cold making it one of the coldest and snowiest December's we have had for a long time. This year, more so than any other, I have had a hard time embracing winter and I often find myself wishing I were living somewhere a little south of here. Maybe that means my time in MN is coming to an end, who knows. But for now, I am trying to have a better attitude about driving on icy roads while being very bundled up. Thankfully, all the Christmas signs and happenings helped to make it a little easier.

Triathlon...I Finished!

As many of you know, I competed in my first ever triathlon on June 29 in Rochester, MN. The triathlon consisted of a 1/4 mile swim, a 10.2 mile bike, and a 3.2 mile run. The training was hard and took a lot of mental determination to complete but it got me through the race. My goal was 1. to finish and 2. to run the entire last portion. I accomplished both of my goals. I finished the race in 1 hour and 40 minutes, not the fastest time on the planet but I ran the entire 3.2 miles! A great accomplishment considering that back in January I couldn't even run 1 mile without my asthma kicking in. 

(internet is super slow tonight so I'll add some pictures later!)

Thanks Lord for the strength and stamina to finish this race and to complete this goal! 

The Joys of Starting

I got to spend 2 weeks this summer as a YouthWorks Starter. What that means is that I travel to one of our mission sites for a week to help the staff get up and running. I am an extra set of hands as well as a voice of experience to help them run a successful first week for our participants. 

My first starting adventure took me to Sisseton, SD. A small town on the South Dakota/Minnesota border. I drove there from the Twin Cities and after my 4 hour car ride was grateful to find an incredible and caring staff at the other end. One of them had seen YouthWorks before as a high school youth; other than that they were greener than green to the YouthWorks world.  They were amazing though and did a great job. When Friday came I didn't want to go and they didn't want me to leave. We all put off my departure as long as possible and even tried to brainstorm a few ways that I could stay with them. After being there for a week (and immediately jumping back into Area Director mode-I have done that job for the last 5 years so it was easy to slip into) I began to see all the ways I was hoping that they would be grown and stretched this summer-in their faith, as well as individually. It was a sad realization to face that I wouldn't be getting that chance personally but would have to suffice with updates from their Area Director as well as random phone calls to them throughout the summer. I loved my time at Lake Traverse and was sad to leave. 

Me and the Site Director for Lake Traverse, Mandy

we're looking pretty good for being sleep deprived and unshowered!

Next I headed up to Sault Ste Marie, MI (which is on the Upper Peninsula right next to Canada), which was a site I had been Area Director for the year before. I was excited to head back to a familiar place but I was still missing the Lake Traverse team and was a little bit nervous to be meeting a new set of staff. Upon my arrival I found 4 very laid back people who seemed to have a lot of problems taking initiative and making decisions. I didn't seem to connect with them as quickly or as naturally as I had with the Lake Traverse team and I was afraid that I was in for a very long and very hard week. I have rarely been more grateful to say that I was wrong. While the staff was still pretty laid back and somewhat quiet, they jumped in and did a great job. I ended up having a blast with them, especially the Site Director who is somewhat of an absurd quirky but really quality guy. By Thursday night I couldn't think about going home because I wanted to break into tears. I hate good-byes in the first place and now I was saying good-bye to the second set of great staff that I had just begun to get to know. As with Lake Traverse, I saw areas in each of their lives that I hoped they would grow in this summer. The whole plane trip home (all 4 airports of it), I tried not to think about the fact that I was 1. done being out for the summer and would have to go back to the office and sit behind a desk (being on site reminded me how much I love what I do and about why I do it) and 2. that I was leaving 4 people that I really wanted to spend more time with (not to mention the 4 from Lake Traverse whom I was already missing).  I felt so blessed by the 2 weeks I got to be out in communities working with youth and adults. It was an amazingly refreshing and uplifting time, despite how tired I was upon returning home.It is such an amazing feeling to put your faith into action and to be filled with so much purpose. 

The Sault Ste Marie Staff-Ross, Reuben-the Site Director, Erin, & Shannon at Iriqouis lighthouse on Lake Superior. We went there for a little sight seeing/quiet time fun! Notice the sweatshirts-despite being the end of June it was a bit chilly out there. I was wearing jeans,  a long sleeve shirt, a light fleece jacket and a hat! 

Me with the staff at our Thursday night evening activity-going to the home of on of our community friends who lives on Lake Superior for swimming (or a polar dip), kayaking, and bonfire fun. Again, we are freezing so we are in our warm clothes! 

All in all I loved starting and it has been fun to continue to keep up with the staff in those 2 places. I regularly get text messages from each place asking when I can come back and the Site Director in Sault Ste Marie has even added me to his weekly e-mail updates he sends to friends and family back home.